Tai Lopez Stumps the Trump
by D4rkangelofdeath1996
Summary: The Greatest Story Ever Told.


Tai Lopez Stumps the Trump

By D4rkangelofdeath1996

It was an ordinary day for Tai Lopez, he had just finished reading his book of the day to acquire more fuel units. Tai decided to go take one of his 86 lamborghinis for a drive when suddenly he heard a loud crash. Tai looked outside to see a large wall in the middle of his mansion in the hollywood hills. Tai went out to inspect the wall and saw a couple of mexicans scurrying around it, he tossed some fuel units at them and they scurried back into their holes. Tai crouched near the wall and licked it, he had tasted this before, it was the unmistakable flavor of steel and rebar! Tai knew there was only one man rich and powerful enough to erect a wall of this magnitude, Tai loaded lamborghini #45 up with fuel units and using his knowledge he flew into the sky at mach 5.

Tai arrived the trump tower, he gazed up at it, before Trump became president his tower was as big as a normal skyscraper, but since his election the highest point of his tower is outside of the atmosphere, as Tai looked back at his car he saw some no good fucking wetbacks trying to clean his windshield for a quick buck, Tai was going to deal with the subhuman fuckers himself when suddenly 3 men mutated into elephants came down and ripped the 5 greasy beaners in half. "W-what are you?!" exclaimed Tai "we are the senate, our leader Trump has awarded us these forms for our loyalty" said the buff elephant man, suddenly Tai moved so fast he disappeared, in one second it was over, Tai's immense knowledge allowed him to power his muscles to the point of 58 olympic athletes using the neural electricity generated by his knowledge as the decapitated heads of the republicans lie on the ground one whispered to Tai "you'll never beat him you know" tai didn't let the elephant man intimidate him though "maybe not, but I do know the proven steps to success" Tai using his superhuman strength and agility spun the elephant head around by its trunk and threw it into the tower, Tai screamed " you can wall off the border but you can't wall off my mansion in the hollywood hills"!

Tai entered the tower; met with exactly what he expected, hundreds of Republicans spliced with Trump and Elephant DNA, before Tai could make his move a mysterious acid came out and melted them all, Tai looked around to see a man without a face, the acid all gravitated to the man's face revealing his identity as the first of Trump's lieutenants Ted Cruz! "Why!" Tai exclaimed "because they would have died anyway, my power『 _Melted Face_ 』takes a lot of energy to control and I'd rather not, Cruz's already grilled cheese looking face melted into acid Tai knew if he was touched it would all be over, Tai activated his knowledge and read the motion of the acid and dodged, but ted had snuck his acid around Tai and hit him in the back "it's useless" exclaimed Ted "no" said tai as he pulled out his glock and proceeded to cap a nigga, after disposing of ted, Tai entered the elevator, ready to face his greatest challenge yet.

The elevator door opened revealing good ol' Donny bathing in a vat of money looking as intimidating as ever Donald stood up out of the vat revealing his massive 12 inch penis, "must be the elephant dna" procured Tai in one nanosecond Trump was behind Tai and hit him down to the bottom floor 6,700 miles downward, looking at his defeated adversary Trump exclaimed "7/11 was an inside job." Tai being defeated knew that trump will destroy the multiverse if not taken care of, Tai stood up, used his knowledge to speed up his regeneration and said the mantra that got him through back when he only had $47 in his bank account "2% luck, 40% skill, 7 lamborghinis in the hollywood hills" Tai summed up all of his knowledge and bent the space around him hitting trump with a punch that launched him to the moon "muda muda muda" yelled trump, Trumps money was so vast he could alter reality itself with his power 『 _Pay 2 Win_ 』Tai using his knowledge knew that there must be a finite limit to Trump's money and by extension his power, using his space warp he went the the moon and rko'd Trump into saturn, driving him into the core, Tai took a moment to rest but it was too late, a yellow fiber started to spread around saturn, Trump's hair had enveloped the gas giant, the yellow ball shrunk to a size no greater than a marble, creating a black hole, donny threw the black hole along with himself at tai "BLACK HOLE DA" yelled trump as the black hole collided with tai, thanks to his knowledge tai knew that enough kinetic energy could lower the black hole's density so he used his knowledge to warp his fists into the black hole a million times a second "LAMBOLAMBOLAMBOLAMBOLAMBO" Trump looking as ravenous as a pedophile at a playground yelled "IT'S TOO LATE, YOU CANNOT ESCAPE!" Trump using his reality warping power punched the black hole into tai a billion times a second, transcending instantaneous transportation itself "MONEYMONEYMONEYMONEYMONEY" "LAMBOLAMBOLAMBOLAMBO" "MONEYMONEYMONEYMONEY" Donny pulled back his fist readying his final decillion dollar punch and yelled "I'LL CRUSH YOU FLAT WITH A SMALL LOAN OF DECILLION DOLLARS" Trump forced tai into the black hole where his molecules disintegrated, killing him, Trump had won.

Standing on top of his wall trump laughed and said "Immortality! Eternal Life! … AND POLITICAL POWAH! Suddenly a mysterious voice equated "Hey donny I'm sending you to hell, so be there or be square!" Trump turned his head around and gasped in true utter terror "y-you no it cant be i-IMPOSSIBLE" "oh but it is" proclaimed Mr. Amann as he created a desk the size of the universe to bludgeon trump with, as slammed the desk down, donald revealed his trump card, he reversed all of Amann's power back at him with his hidden power 『 _Economic Collapse_ 』as Amann lie in space defeated, all of his students realized he needed help and started doing trigonometry to help him, they started doing trig faster and faster until their pencils became dull, the students started using their blood until their entire hand was shaved away into trig "OH GOD MAKE IT STOP" screamed each student, but they kept on doing trig until there was nothing left but goop and a completed textbook.

Amann feeling their power readied a desk, infinite in size, and Trump realizing

『 _Economic Collapse_ 』won't work a second time took a small loan of every dollar on earth, the two beings clashed and the desk and money both broke, Mr amann punched donny in the chest ripping his heart out, then donny decapitated Amann with his hair, both noble warriors had died but the universe lived on.


End file.
